Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Obsession

Alright, I'll admit it. I'm weird. Of course, you probably figured that out already if you've been reading these stories for any length of time. I am obsessed. Obsession emanates from within my head and heart and it seeps out through my fingertips, all over these pages. I simply cannot help myself. You see, I absolutely, positively . . . am obsessed.

Obsession in our society is usually thought of as a bad thing . . .

"That guy is obsessed with his car."

"That lady is obsessed with men!"

"That kid is obsessed with his new phone!"

Obsession is defined as . . . "a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal."

DING! That's me! (at least the "not normal" part anyway)

I became obsessed eight years ago. Hmm. That's funny my obsession coincides EXACTLY with the date of my spiritual rebirth. The day I became a Christian. A REAL Christian. Before I was "born again" I CALLED myself a Christian even though I didn't know exactly what that meant. I believed I was going to heaven because ALL Christians go to heaven. That's just the way it is, right? I was what is known as a false convert. People who think they're Christians, or any faith for that matter, but they're really not. That's really kind of scary if you stop and think about it.

I was REALLY obsessed when I first came to believe. I read everything I could get my hands on. Like The Bible! I bought a NIV Bible, then a New King James, an English Standard Version. A Study Bible, a Chronological Bible. And then the books!! Oh, my goodness. I was obsessed. I was obsessed with Jesus Christ. You think I'm obsessed now? I was absolutely crazy 7-8 years ago. Crazy about Jesus, that is.

I am still obsessed today only I have learned how to control it. If the world actually knew, and now I guess it will, just how obsessed I am, I would be locked up in prison. To give you an example of my obsession, my typical day goes something like this:

I wake up at 4:30 AM, usually with a worship song in my head. I get up that early so I can go in to work two hours early. I go in early so I can write this blog, do research for it, and to pray. I do this beacuse whatever I can do in the morning, I DON'T have to do at night, and I can spend that time with my wife.

On my way to work I listen to an audio Bible. I currently have the Book of John on repeat. If it's not that, it's Christian radio or my Ipod which is currently maxed out with Christian music of all kinds.

Every morning during the work week I pray with my best friend. She is the one who lead me to Christ. What a blessing it is to pray with my mentor, my sister and friend. After we're done praying we talk about . . . God. End time theories, people who need prayer, encouragement, accountability, occasional rebuking.

Then it's time for work. I sit down in front of my computer, plug in my headphones, and listen to podcasts of Christian talk shows, seminars and sermons by my favorite pastors and theologians. Right now at work I am listening to A. W. Tozer - a gift from my friend. Good stuff. That goes on all morning.

Then at lunch I carry my Bible upstairs and my friend and I read or talk about God for 60 minutes.

Afternoon? A repeat of the morning. Drive home? The Book of John again. Ask me to recite John 3 sometime. I have it memorized, except for the John the Baptist part.

When I get home I write but usually do so sitting in the living room with my wife. Important! When she's not looking or when she's downstairs, I watch WretchedTV, a Christian TV show. I surf Facebook whenever I can, seeking out hurting people to reach out to in love, offering an encouraging word or a Bible verse. I pray before slipping off to sleep and when I wake up in the middle of the night, I often find myself clutching the cross I wear around my neck. The next day, repeat, repeat, repeat.

Is that obsessive? Do I have an obsession with Jesus? Well . . .

Should I tell you about my tee-shirt collection? Lifest? No Regrets Mens Conference? Power of One? I Am Second wrist band? Maybe not. I have about 40 Christian tee-shirts. Too many? My wife thinks I am obsessed with tee-shirts. I think I am obsessed with Jesus.

Is it obsessive to own a shirt that encourages others to "be obsessive?" I think it is. What do you think? I was baptized in it.

So why am I telling you all this? Why am I boring you with all of the mundane details of my obsessive life? Because for as obsessed as I am with Jesus, as much I was want to tell everyone about this God-man who saved my life, as much as I want to eat, sleep and breathe Jesus Christ every minute of every day, I am afraid.

Why am I afraid? Because I think I am not obsessed enough. I think that we who call ourselves Christians these days are not obsessed at all when compared to the likes of A.W. Tozer or J.C. Ryle. I am also afraid because I have seen plenty of self-professing Christians who still live a very worldly lifestyle and have the nerve to believe that they are righteous in God's eyes, even though they disobey his commands and continue to sin unrepentantly, right in the face of God. And I'm talking about me!

Billy Graham was asked recently if he regretted anything in his life. He told the reporter that he regretted not studying God's Word enough. He regretted not praying enough. And that is Billy Graham!!!

I need to become obsessed. More obsessed! I need to be 100%, every minute of every day, cannon ball into the deep end of the pool, obsessed with The Gospel. I need to yell it from the mountain tops, crawl on my hands and knees and beg people I don't even know to listen to the words of God. To heed His warnings, accept His free gift of salvation and call on the name of Jesus in everything they do.

We Christians need to become obsessed. We need to make Jesus our only focus. Our ONLY focus. Anything else disobeys the greatest commandment.

"‘Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart and with ALL your soul and with ALL your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment." - Matthew 22:37-38

May we ALL become obsessed. May we ALL seek Him above all else. We need to turn off the television and pick up His perfect Word and learn, grow and praise the God who gave us life. Then perhaps we can get a glimpse of just how deep, how far, how wide and how mighty this God is that we serve.

Obsession by Skillet

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